Mistake. O sea, Chance to Learn.

So I made what felt like to me, a big mistake this week. I've written about Aqulina before. She and her husband Placido live in Chiaucingo and are major promoters there. Aquilina helps us with all kinds of things, organizing meetings, contact person for projects, I could go on and on. Placido makes the toilets for the dry latrines and is also very helpful with the projects. So recently Aquilina helped get 100 bags of cement from the municipal president for 36 dry latrines in Chiaucingo. She continues to help out all the time, even though she already has her dry latrine. She has mentioned a number of times recently how much work it is, looking for funds, organizing groups, distributing material, helping with the construction, answering questions etc.

Well another group of people in Chiaucingo would like to build 40 cisterns. Aquilina helped them fill out and turn in the forms to us awhile ago. Last week I had a meeting with the group, and I told Aquilina that she didn't have to come, I could work with the group and the group could elect a committee and, well, we'd see what happened. (Aquilina already has a cistern.) I thought I was giving her a way out. I thought I was helping take some responsibilities off her plate. I thought it would be a good opportunity for other people to take on more responsibility and share the load.

But after the meeting, Aquilina pulled me aside and told me how much I had hurt her, that she felt like an old dishrag tossed aside and forgotten. (While I had the cistern meeting, Aquilina was at a garden meeting nearby. She was listening with one ear to the cistern meeting and one ear to the garden meeting. Both meetings were at the local clinic.)

I felt horrible. Later I was able to celebrate the fact that our relationship is such that she was able to tell me that I had hurt her. She said that she should have been at the meeting. Last year's committee should have been there to "hand off" the responsibilities to the new committee. She said she wants to keep helping out. Yes, it's a lot of work, but she wants to do it.
So we talked and talked. And cried and cried. And hugged.

Later at the office I talked with my coworker Manuel and together we came up with the idea to invite Aquilina to work with the group in a different capacity - as a "bridge" between the group and MCC. Manuel talked with Aquilina. She said she would think about it. Then I talked with her, and she said yes. Together we made an agenda for the next meeting and we co-facilitated the meeting. A new committee was elected. So now the committee from the community, Aquilina, and me - all 5 of us are working to find funds for the cisterns. And so the learning continues.